Sunday, 15 April 2007

Rantdom Thurogitts 1.8

Mood: Morphing, starving, wishing yesterday could happen again
Frig Index: 0.00000001
Communism Bit: Off
Location: Job, of course

Things to write 'bout.

Okay. 'Tis official. The next BHH is upon us. 26th of April, 2006 2007. Jeeve it up for that boy. He's such a talented artist.
And our Jackfruity is back from out the undead. Yay!

While at it, I might as well tell you one of my Top Three lists. My favourite locksmen?

  1. Dedan Kimathi.
    Know what? If you ever lead so much as a shouting match against the Brit empire and all them other downpressors, you are hot. Cool. Maybe not good, but surely cool.

  2. Bob Marley.
    Whenever there is anything to say about Bob, it is better said in his own words. But whenever there is anything to say about the world, it is best said in Bob's own words.
    ``But someone will 'ave to pay for the innocent blood that they shed everyday. O, children mark my word. It's what the Bible say (sic).'' — Bob Marley (We and Dem)

  3. I and I.
    Yep. Gon' spin a dreadlock. But it seems everyone is tired of hearing me promise, by now. Thing is, I should be out getting it spun, right now, but I am here before my PC. These things happen. I'll just stop promising, and then, someday ...

(Kimathi image sourced from—please read, or at least just skim through.)

Plus, I have found that my favourite (actually, formerly-favourite) word, frig, has some meanings that may not sit well with some people I use it around. So, I am dropping it. I used it for the sheer force of the suddenness it carried while leaping out from between my lips, spittle and froth following. But, now, it is persona-non-grata motto-non-grata. Don't mind the words here. Just suggest some equally-powerful-sounding words, please. I need one, you know. But we had fun, me and [toot!], while it lasted.

Also, while I talk of words ... CB, yesterday, noted that one thing that set Ugandan bloggers apart from the rest was the culture that had formed from their being tight-knit. Like new words that keep getting kicked up. `Blogren' is official! Well, almost. Check Google. As in, it's clearly our invention.

And ... Thank you, Baz, for being such a pal. You know how to keep promises. The revolution could do with more of you.

The Danes rock. Hard. Was at their crib, yesterday. They rock [toot!] hard. (Hey, what just happened to my word? Oh, [toot!] it. Whatever.)
I was saying, they rock. And for the snacks, drinks, et al, tiak. (Is that the spelling?)

In closing ... (Hang on; it's almost over! If you shake, it will only take longer!)
Is Robert Mugabe bad? In a word, no. The Brits have managed, through sustained propaganda, to convince us that we have a gorgon on our hands. Well, he is not good, in case I was putting your heart in harm's way. But that he is presiding over Zimbabwe's economic situation doesn't make him bad. The Great Depression was very similar to today's Zimbabwe. Yet nobody labeled the American president of the time (Roose-something) a bad guy. I wonder if anyone can stand up and honestly say George Bush is a better man than Robert Mugabe. Yet how many times has Bush been called everything Mugabe has been called? So, okay, Mugabe is only slightly better than Bush. How bad Mugabe is depends on you, because I leave the placement of Bush to you. Bush, by the way, is the guy of Iraq and Hurricane Katrina. And a million other deaths in Africa every [toot!]in' day.

Lastly, ... hehehe. :oD You thought the ordeal was going on, eh? Okay, lemme let you fly along, pretty little dove. (Shouting to the bird in the distance, through the barred window ...) `And don't get caught in the rain!' (With a longing Morgan-Freeman smile on his face, wrinkles running out of the corners of his eyes, spreading viciously into his face and as far down as the legs held down by shackles for the thirty-second year in a row, guiding the tears as they go.) `And tell the Free People to come and fight for our freedom!'

Ah, the beauty of pure randomness!


Be silent said...

did u mean 26th April 2007?

bantutu said...

I was here and I'll be back..

Aegeus said...

I am lurking - Bantutu, where did you come from? Hheheheeh! The beauty of randomness!

S.A.G.E said...

Yo commie! Jus like blogren, yo invention, as a hip hope affiliate. Amma drop yo name some hip flavour. I will call u commie from this day henceforth cos u aint jus a hommie. U is a commie. Aight?
Oh! almost forgot. The album is now in ma hands and ma palms sweat thinkin of going soul platinum. Dont use that frig word cos it was becoming a cliche and it does carry innuendos. Hit me on the hip...holla!

eddiie said...

Bob Marley..wooh! i wonder when the cops will stop haunting peoples lips...

Mbu he is still a celeb...A dead one?Come on guys, yes he was good but that was then, remember him but seize making him a cult..

Leave that to the Ethiopinas and may be Jamaicans..

Dennis Matanda said...

The difference between Mugabe and the Depression American President is that between 1925 and 1930, there was a general depression in America - expenditure and output were low. In Zimbabwe - where I was last week - its just plain old politics ruling the day. And for the record, his full name is Comrade Robert Mugabe. Hint Hint, Commie, as SAGE would say. Before I forget, Mugabe's Central Bank Governor has accused him of being responsible for the depression.

leos child said...

bob marley my brother from another mother.

Willie Boy said...

Bush surely is bushy but Mugabe, his post indepence struggles aside, is shit! Why isn't Bush castigated in equal measures like Mugabe when he is also a bad boy? Because the US is a super power. Take this. The US is very opposed to the Hague based International Criminal Court because it fears an independent prosecutor can bring war charges against its leaders but at the same time its claiming to be promoting justice and peace. If dusty Mugabe had wide shoulders with lots of bucks, and was of strategic importance to the West not one would wink an eyelid. Before the war on terror kick started the boring administration of Bush, Pakistan's Gen Pervez Musharraf was a hot despot then he suddenly became a US allie! Mugabe is poor, dusty and ugly that's why he's the West's punching bag. His attacks on Bush and Blair are the last kicks of a dying horse. Regards Comrade

bantutu said...

He be la(o)cking (h)is hair eh? Good luck on that...I have this mass on mine head...waiting of operation-bright-Idea...Locks might just be one of them...Bab Morley Yah mon!! Best sed in his words indeed...natural Mystic blows Forever!!
Oh an about [toot!] hihihi!! Hows about
Twok index... They rock twokkin hard!! Heheheheh!!

K said...

So you're dropping "frig" eh? I thought you used it precisely because it had all those subversive meanings...

And as for Mugabe? I'm with Matanda on this one. 27th, hard as it may be to believe, bad black people exist.

Heaven! said...

ever been to some party when a speaker keeps saying lastly and yet never finishing those 'last' points?...

in closing....



good thing you make fine reading!

The 27th Comrade said...

@BS: Oh, [toot!]! I meant 2007! Should edit. When I get a gap.

@S.A.G.E: Whatevs. I may revert to the word if I find people actually hate it. :oD

@Eddie: Well, if Bob is no celeb, what is he? Or what is Britney Spears? Brit-what? Bob is more-searched than bin Laden. Says something.
I don't deify Bob, but he definitely is worth more memory than ... Adolf Hitler, for example. He is no celeb. Just an artiste who died before I was born, and here I am singing his music - and liking it - a quarter of a century after his death. He is no celeb. He is a legend.

@Dennis: Well, I guess Willie Boy dropped the answer quite well. It's not whether or not Roose-something's grotesque failures were whitewshed or not (including where his men blamed him for America's plight). It is whether the blame is fair.

@K: Nah. Just used it for the force of the word. 'Tis dropped. And, aye, there are many, many bad blacks, especially the leaders.
But can you believe there are also those who aren't bad? Me, I don't. Because I watch CNN exclusively. Especially the leaders.
When there are no dictators in Africa, there is no politics worth talking about in Africa. Especially the absence of dictators.

@Bantuts: Yeah, mon. Yah, mon.
I'm gon' dread. I dunno, when, though.
And, on `twok' ... hmm, I have added it to the list.

Samantha said...

There are 20 things I hate, 18 that are detestable to me about the story in that link. Imagine:
1. Idi Amin being referred to as ‘not much grey matter, but a splendid chap to have about.’
2. It was in Kenya that Amin learned many of the brutal practices that he would employ against his own people in Uganda many years later.
3. In the British Army Handbook, which was distributed to all officers, under a section discussing the handling of African trackers assigned to Army units, it read: “The African is simple, not very intelligent, but very willing if treated in the right way? Do not regard him as a slave or an equal. You will find that most Africans have an innate respect for the white man.”
4. Some soldiers, usually after drinking, stopped Africans at random, beat them, and stole whatever valuables they possessed.
5. A remark like “Out in Kenya we hated that ‘black cannibal’ Jomo Kenyatta”
6. Often detainees were beaten unconscious, some were beaten to death.
7. One screening camp used a loyalist Kikuyu to castrate prisoners who refused to confess.
8. Other brutal practices included burning with lit cigarettes, cutting off fingers and ears and soaking victims with paraffin, who were then set on fire.
9. When Mau Mau were killed in the reserves, their bodies were lined up for public display. Sometimes they were photographed with their dead eyes staring into the lens of the camera.
10. Women were required to perform forced labour as heavy as that expected of men, as they built roads and cleared away stumps and boulders, all the while being watched and sometimes whipped by male guards.
11. Periodically, the guards raped anyone they chose and venereal disease became epidemic among the detainees.
12. When women gave birth in detention, they seldom received medical attention. That they gave birth at all was remarkable, since most were so malnourished from their diet of water and beans that many suffered from pellagra. ...
13. The women were also beaten, kicked, whipped, and sadistically made to bare their buttocks and sit on a wire mesh that had been heated red-hot over a charcoal burner.
14. Tory MP John Peel dismissed the deaths as one of the risks of ‘dealing with desperate and sub-human individuals’ who had taken Mau Mau oaths.
15. Before he was killed Kariuki had prophetically warned that Kenya could become a country of ‘ten millionaires and ten million beggars’.
16. Kenyan sources have put the number of anti-colonial Africans killed in the conflict much higher, with 50,000 being suggested as something like the probable figure. And if we added the native people who died from starvation, disease and trauma brought on by deportations and ill treatment the toll could be well over 100,000.
17. Many people in Britain had been led to believe by sensational press reports that rebels had killed thousands of white Kenyans. But during the entire Emergency, the total number of white civilians who died at the hands of Mau Mau rebels was 32.
18. Over the same period of time, more white Kenyans were killed in traffic accidents in Nairobi alone than were killed by Mau Mau rebels. A fact one would never have realised from reading the British papers at the time: ‘British tabloids, invariably wrote about “innocent”, “helpless”, or “heroic” whites being “slaughtered” or “butchered” by “fanatical”, “bestial”, “satanic”, “savage”, “barbaric”, “degraded”, or “merciless”, Mau Mau “gangsters”, or “terrorists”.

Samantha said...

On no. 15, I meant to add that even though this prediction has come to pass, nothing has been done to change the situation.

The 27th Comrade said...

@Heaven! I was trying to be that kind of speaker. Although I certainly pray I don't suck as much.

@Samantha: Beautiful summary. I should link to it in my next post.
You see how enraging it is? And what interests me is that these Brits actually believed all these things. It is easy to cling to a belief. Any belief. More importantly, that the Brits out in Europe were kept in the dark about the atrocities being committed in their name should tell you something about who to believe (i.e., nobody). CNN and BBC, et al, are all engineered to make us believe some things about ourselves and other people.

And on Kariuki's prophecy, well ... the Revolution is coming! We'll change things! :oD

S.A.G.E said...

Samantha shud have saved that comment for her blog entry.

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